You're so nebulous sometimes
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
