The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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