Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Randomize
