You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
