Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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