well most of my day revolves around power hour
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
