the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Randomize