"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
