nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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