Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize
