your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
