either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I enjoy the company of your penis
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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