Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
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