I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
