Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
