Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
