it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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