NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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