Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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