Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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