I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
