I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Randomize
