I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
I'm really busy with my period
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