Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Randomize
