too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
