But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
then he tried to convert me to islam
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
