why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
