worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
