its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
