Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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