Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
