I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Randomize
