I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
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