What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
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