Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
