Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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