I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
