Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
