We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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