i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize