they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Operation Purity has been aborted
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize