I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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