S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
