3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
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