It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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