I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
