And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
