so explain again why im purple
no
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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