Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
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