therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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